Your landing page is bad. Goblin shows you how to fix it.
Paste your URL and Goblin scores it across twelve things that actually move signups — then tells you, in plain words, what to change. Free, in about 30 seconds.
WHAT GOBLIN LOOKS AT
Twelve things, scored.
Same rubric every time. No grading on a curve, no points for trying hard. If it's vague, you'll hear about it.
Above The Fold
- 01
Hero clarity
Who is this for and what does it do.
- 02
CTA prominence
One clear action. visible.
- 03
Value prop specificity
Concrete promise or vague aspiration.
- 04
Trust signals
Logos, names, numbers. or nothing.
Content Quality
- 05
Copy concreteness
Real outcomes or marketing speak.
- 06
Social proof depth
Named customers or "happy users".
- 07
Objection handling
Does it address what makes buyers hesitate.
Design and UX
- 08
Visual hierarchy
Does the eye know where to go.
- 09
Mobile rendering
Does it work on a real phone.
- 10
Page speed signals
First paint. layout shift. the boring stuff.
Conversion Mechanics
- 11
Form and CTA friction
How many fields. how many clicks. how much pain.
- 12
Pricing clarity
Is the price visible. is it simple.
QUESTIONS GOBLIN GETS A LOT
Things people ask.
Is this actually mean? +
It's honest, which sometimes reads as mean. Goblin roasts the page, never you. If you wanted a gentle pat on the back, that's what your co-founder is for.
What if my page is genuinely good? +
Then you'll hear it — with evidence, and maybe a little grumbling. It doesn't happen often, but it happens.
How long does it take? +
About 30 to 60 seconds. Goblin reads fast.
What pages can I submit? +
Most public landing pages — SaaS, mobile apps, agencies, courses, e-commerce. Password-protected pages and internal dashboards are out. Those aren't landing pages.
What if Goblin gets it wrong? +
It's opinionated, not infallible. Take what's useful, ignore what isn't. Spot something it clearly missed? Email us — Goblin grumbles, then learns.
Is it really free? +
Yes. Every roast is the full roast — all twelve dimensions, rewrites, priority fixes and the PDF. No account, no card, no catch.
Ready to hear the truth?
Paste your URL — Goblin does the rest. Free full report, no account, about 30 seconds.
Roast my page